God to Palin: I want YOU for Prez!

America's most hated stand-up comedian, Sarah Palin (who is also a governor), told the muy macho Greta Van Susteren that God will show her the way into the White House.

"I'm like, OK, God, if there is an open door for me somewhere, this is what I always pray, I'm like, don't let me miss the open door. Show me where the open door is," Palin said.

Personally, I'm not what you'd call religious, but I imagine that prayers should be directed less toward personal gain and fulfilling one's own appetite of avarice. I also imagine prayers as being more formal in terms of language. I don't expect a recitation in keeping with the King James style, but I don't think that a garbled mish-mash of casual parlance and leet-speak is the way to go about it, either. "OMG God plz halp me get 2 the WH and well b BFF, kk?"

Still speaking of God as her doorman, Palin continued, "Even if it's cracked up a little bit, maybe I'll plough right on through that and maybe prematurely plough through it, but don't let me miss an open door."